We all negotiate - whether in the workplace, at home or in volunteer activities. We do because we all have needs and sometimes these needs conflict with the needs of others (e.g. "I need a low price and the supplier wants the highest possible price").

For negotiation to happen, however, there must be common needs ("We are in conflict over the price but we both want to make this deal"); equally, we both must be willing to exchange or give something up to get those needs fulfilled. Negotiation, properly speaking, is a process defined, according to the dictionary as "settling by bargaining."

There are 3 important stages to plan for in Negotiation. The opening, the middle and the close.

In the opening you want to set a positive climate and let the other know what you want.

In the middle, you want to listen and ask a lot of questions that will help you know what the other wants and why.

And in the close you want make a deal that helps exchange what each of you will do for each other, create a Win/Win if possible.

Like any process, to make it work for us we need to understand the stages of the process and how to address those stages to meet our interests. In negotiation, "lack of preparation is perhaps our most serious handicap." (Fisher and Ertel, 1995).

Always ask for more to get more. This has been shown to be a negotiation truism.

Effective negotiators aim high as they determine their opening position. "In negotiation, success-oriented people will tend to set their targets higher and be more optimistic of their chances for success." (Karass, 1970).

Effective negotiators establish a target range of acceptable offers. They establish clear desired objectives as well as a minimum negotiation limit and a "walk-away" position.

Asking questions to understand the other's needs and to open up the meeting to possible alternatives is very important. What else can each side do to help reach agreement? This is the middle stage where exploring underlying needs and showing understanding for each others position helps foster good will.

Excellent negotiators gather as much information as they can about the other party. They estimate the other party's needs, opening position, currencies they might be able to offer, alternatives and situation as much as possible. (Berlew, Moore and Harrison, 1984)

Lastly, in your plan you want to think about what you are willing to give to get in the closing stage. How will what you are offering be of interet to the other. This is where you make your deal. And the agreement must be understood completely by each side to avoid conflicts later.

Proper planning will help you win every time.

Alan Vengel is a consultant in management training and organizational development and author of The Influence Edge - How to Persuade Others to Help You Achieve Your Goals. He offers cutting edge training and skill building workshops on influence and negotiation.
alan@vengelconsulting.comhttp://www.vengelconsulting.com.